


This Is Me

by I_am_a_closet_fanfic_fiend



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: From the Greatest Showman, Inspired by This Is Me, Mentions of canon typical violence, References to Abuse, Song fic, references to trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:35:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26352760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_am_a_closet_fanfic_fiend/pseuds/I_am_a_closet_fanfic_fiend
Summary: Peter shows Bucky a youtube tribute video about him.
Kudos: 12





	This Is Me

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hi my lovelies! I hope you all have a great week and for now enjoy this. It’s been kicking around in my head since I watched the Greatest Showman. I really wish I had the skills to do video edits - those of you who do them seriously amaze me. Because if I did I would probably try to actually make what I describe, but alas, all I’ve got is words. I hope it comes across. 
> 
> Warnings: References to Bucky’s torture and other abuse and physical trauma. Not detailed by present nonetheless.
> 
> Disclaimer: Lyrics to This is Me belong to the Greatest Showman team. I do not own them or the characters. Just my plot bunnies. 

“Hey, Bucky, do you want to see a cool youtube video?” 

Peter was sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table looking at his computer. 

“Depends on what it is. Because if it’s another compilation of Tony Stark’s best drunken tirades, I’ll pass.” 

“No. This one’s about you.” 

“About me?” Bucky finished making their sandwiches and sat beside him on the floor. “I don’t give enough interviews to have a best drunken tirade compilation.” 

“No, it’s not that. It’s a fanvideo,” Peter explained, turning the screen so Bucky could see it. 

“What does that mean?” 

“Basically someone thought one particular song reminded them of you and put together a video of clips and pictures to the music.” 

Bucky understood the concept, but he was confused as to why somewhat would put in the effort for him. 

“So, what song reminds people of me?” 

“Do you remember the movie the Greatest Showman? We watched it a couple of weeks ago.” 

“Is that the one about the circus?” 

“Yeah, exactly,” Peter grinned. “Well someone thought the song This is Me applied to you, and they made this video.” 

Bucky held his breath as Peter pressed play. 

_I am not a stranger to the dark  
Hide away, they say  
‘Cause we don’t want your broken parts  
I’ve learned to be ashamed of all my scars  
Run away, they say  
No one’ll love you as you are_

The first few clips and photos were from his Winter Soldier days. They showed him in the chair being wiped. He cringed at the sight, but he understood why they chose the song. No one should love him. 

_But I won’t let them break me down to dust  
I know that there’s a place for us  
For we are glorious_

They cut to him in his new uniform. It was a news reel from a few weeks ago. He was on the roof of the building, standing in front of the setting sun. He almost looked… heroic. 

_When the sharpest words wanna cut me down  
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out  
I am brave, I am bruised  
I am who I’m meant to be, this is me  
Look out 'cause here I come  
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum  
I’m not scared to be seen  
I make no apologies, this is me_

This whole section showed the footage from his trial. United States vs. Barnes. They attempted to try him for treason. Tony’s pack of lawyers had argued that he had no control over what he did. Bucky had spent those court days stone faced, awaiting judgment. He stood up, answering the questions they asked of him, letting the world and the court get their first real look at him. 

_Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh, oh_

_Another round of bullets hits my skin  
Well, fire away 'cause today, I won’t let the shame sink in  
We are bursting through the barricades and  
Reaching for the sun (we are warriors)  
Yeah, that’s what we’ve become (yeah, that’s what we’ve become)_

When the court had exonerated him, he rejoined the Avengers, doing his best to save the world or whatever part of it he could. The video segued into newsreels of him fighting aliens or crazy villains. It showed him getting civilians to safety, stopping bullets with his vibranium arm. . 

_I won’t let them break me down to dust  
I know that there’s a place for us  
For we are glorious_

_When the sharpest words wanna cut me down  
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out  
I am brave, I am bruised  
I am who I’m meant to be, this is me  
Look out 'cause here I come  
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum  
I’m not scared to be seen  
I make no apologies, this is me_

It cut to him visiting kids in the hospital missing limbs. The first time Pepper had come to ask him to go see them, he had refused outright. Not because he didn’t want to, but because he couldn’t understand why anyone would find comfort in him. But it started with one little girl who had written him several letters, and he finally agreed to see her. And after he saw the joy in her eyes he had visited everyone he could. After the children’s hospitals, it was veterans, and abuse survivors. He made time for anyone who wanted to speak with him. 

_Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh, oh  
This is me_

_and I know that I deserve your love  
(Oh-oh-oh-oh) 'cause there’s nothing I’m not worthy of  
(Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh, oh)  
When the sharpest words wanna cut me down  
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out  
This is brave, this is proof  
This is who I’m meant to be, this is me_

It changed to a split screen of the video clip of him and Steve from the Smithsonian where they were laughing and an almost identical video clip from an interview a few weeks before. 

_Look out 'cause here I come (look out 'cause here I come)  
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum (marching on, marching, marching on)  
I’m not scared to be seen  
I make no apologies, this is me_

_When the sharpest words wanna cut me down  
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out  
I’m gonna send a flood  
Gonna drown them out  
Oh  
This is me_

The final video clip was from his own set of PSA’s that he had been asked to do. 

“Hi, I’m Bucky Barnes. And I’m here to tell you that you’re strong and you can make it through this.” 

The final card filled the screen. 

##  _Thank you, Sergeant Barnes for your service then and now. You inspire me every day to be me._

Bucky discreetly wiped away the tears that had formed from some dust getting into his eyes. 

“Did you like it?” Peter asked, as he turned off the autoplay feature. 

“I did. Thank you for the video, Peter.”

“You’re welcome.” 

He sniffed and offered him a watery smile. 

“I think Steve left some apple pie hidden in the fridge. Do you want to share?” 

“Absolutely.” 

“I’ll be back in a few.” 

He clapped him on the shoulder, squeezing gently to convey what he couldn’t quite bring himself to say. 

While Bucky was in the kitchen Tony strolled into the living room. 

“Hey, kid. Did Barnes like the video you made him?” 

“I think so.” Peter grinned. 

* * *


End file.
